Friday, 8 August 2008

Here comes the bride...

Traditionally, at a wedding, the bride is supposed to be late. Well, yesterday, me and various members of my father's side of the family broke this tradition, by being half an hour late! Oops...

As weddings go, this one was lovely. Despite being in a church (vile, evil places of sin!) The bride was stunning, the groom was...well..he had a lovely suit! The choir were fantastic, albeit a bit fond of the aul westlife! We were serenaded with Flying Without Wings, The Rose, You Raise Me Up...sensing a pattern here? They were amazing though, I had goosebumps from start to finish! 

We then waited outside for the wedding pictures to be taken by the arsehole of a photographer. I was heard to gripe 'who's fucking wedding is it anyway?' numerous times! I could think of far better things he could be doing with his camera (but I'm too much of a lady to say that!!)

On to the hotel, which was many many miles away, down the Naas road, and into...emm..some hotel that I can't remember the name of! We were left to stew in some room upstairs for about 3 hours before dinner was served. In the course of which a woman got stung by one of the many wasps buzzing around, and we were regaled by a magician who looked like a Status Quo reject! 

Then on to dinner! We were shoved at a table down the back, shunned! We were encouraged to drink far too much (there were little teeny buckets on the table with Lifeline and Solphadene in them) and to gamble (bets on how long the speeches would go on for!)
The food was...well..less than impressive! It didn't help that I was sitting beside my auntie the chef, (Iceberg lettuce in a Caesar salad!! The soup needs cream!!)..

When that was all finished, the fun began!! On to the speeches! Yours truly had a bet on 45 mins, stopwatches were started, and off they went! First, father of the bride...a grand total of less than a minute...and it snowballed from there. 19 minutes in total! A shambles!!!

At this stage, I'm fairly well on and everything is hilarious! There are rumours of an ABBA tribute band...and 2 hours later, when the band finally ABBA!! 60's music!! I danced, I sat, I drank, I danced, I sat, I drank...

Fun times had by all!